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Former Prime Minister of Glanainn founds new anti-Opthelia political party

Sawney Almond, a former Prime Minister of Glanainn, has quit his previous political party in order to found a new anti-Opthelia rival which claims to want “full independence” from Opthelia. While not the first party to argue for greater autonomy and less Opthelian influence, the new Glannish Independence Party is the most explicitly anti-Opthelian party to have been formed by a well-known political figure rather than unknown fringe groups with no platform. The group wishes to leave the Opthelian Commonwealth, and break with the long-standing policy to follow Opthelian foreign policy.

Almond is considered by many to have “gone off the deep end” after leaving office in 2012. As Prime Minister from 2007-2012, he was considered a primarily centrist figure who avoided rocking the boat. He was supportive of autonomy for Glanainn but did not generally make anti-Opthelian comments in public. However, his comments within media interviews, and his social media posts, have become embroiled in conspiracy theories in recent years. His recent blog posts have included theories that the Opthelian population is only 1/6 of the reported figure; that Empress Athena II is secretly in a lesbian relationship with Empress Calhualyana of Xiomera; and that the tap water in Glanainn has been laced with “obedience drugs”.

Current Prime Minister Caitlin Mackintosh, when asked for comment, dismissed concerns around the Glannish Independence Party (GIP), stating: “this is a fringe organisation started by a man who, unfortunately, is exhibiting signs of dementia or a psychotic break. He needs medical care, not media attention.” She went on to dismiss the possibility that GIP will win any seats in the next parliamentary elections, claiming the electorate would dismiss the group out of hand. “They might take away some votes from the Behemoth Ranting Batty Party”, she added, naming a joke party who run in elections wearing bizarre costumes.

There are no current moves to ban the GIP, Mackintosh confirmed, stating that there was no purpose in banning a group that has shown no evidence of having enough support to mount any threat. Other parliamentarians also noted that the party serves no purpose, given that Glanainn is already independent, and Opthelia is merely a valued friend and additional protector of the country. Autonomy was granted to Glanainn by Opthelia in 1967.

Reports have also come in that a police wellness check has been called in on Mr Almond, though police sources refuse to confirm the rumours due to privacy reasons. There is no evidence to suggest Mr Almond has been removed from his property or hospitalised in a mental health care facility.

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